Parenting: The Challenge » Uncategorized

Spanking, Where Do You Stand?

admin — Thu, 15 Jul 2010 22:19:10 +0000

The debate on spanking has been around for a long time, for some they would never think to use it as discipline. Others may have been spanked as a child and don’t see it as a big deal. Being a parent myself, I do not see spanking as an effective way to discipline my child. There are many other effective ways to teach your children how to behave better. I think that spanking can instill fear in a child that can be held onto for years into adulthood. Getting down to your child’s level when they have a tantrum or an upset and letting them know that you understand can be very helpful. Following through with the boundaries you set makes a huge difference and your child will learn that you are not just making empty threats. If you run into an issue where your child is badly misbehaving, remove them from the situation and give them some time to take a break or settle down in their room if you are at home. If you are having a hard time with discipline at home, it’s not a bad idea to take on a parenting class, specifically one that deals with a positive approach.

How to Handle a Friend’s or Relatives Differing Parenting Style

admin — Tue, 15 Jun 2010 22:38:30 +0000

Not everyone has the same parenting style and there will be times when your child may spend time with someone that parents differently than you do. If their style is radically different from how you parent how do you handle that? The best thing to do is to speak up about the things that are really important to you. Occasionally your rules can be bent if they are not endangering your child, like a later bed time. When it comes to discipline be clear with whoever will be in charge so that there are no misunderstandings about what you’re ok with and what you’re not ok with. If you have good relationships with your friends and family they will respect your choices and you will respect theirs just be cautious if a huge issue arrises.

Take Your Children to the Park and Leave Them

admin — Tue, 01 Jun 2010 21:42:35 +0000

This is the suggestion from the “radical free-range” mother Lenore Skenazy. She believes that is your child is at least 7 years old they can be left at the park for an hour or 10 minutes, whatever you can handle, so that they can meet and play with other children. This is one of the ways she gives her child more independence. Parents think the world is more dangerous than when we ourselves were children. When we were children we could ride our bikes and play with the neighbors until dark. I agree that children need to learn to take care of themselves and be allowed to do so, that doesn’t make you a bad parent. Parents just need to get through the social pressure of how you should parent.

Parents Need “Adult” Time

admin — Tue, 18 May 2010 21:07:32 +0000

It’s great for parents to have other parents to talk to about parenthood and their children. There is a valuable understanding that is very helpful when you go through the journey of raising a family. However it is also very important to discuss things outside the realm of parenting. Don’t feel guilty talking about things that are not related to your children, like you are not allowed to speak of your life before kids. Yes your role in life may have changed, but you are still someone besides “mom” and it’s great to be able to relate to people on other levels. Every parent needs a break at some point from talking about their kids and asking questions and getting advice, but for your own mental well-being choose a different topic of conversation.

Can Sleep Training Cause Brain Damage?

admin — Tue, 04 May 2010 21:50:28 +0000

I recently read an article about a new book that came out discussing how sleep training can damage babies’ brains. In her book, “The Essential First Year,” by Penelope Leach she says that letting your baby cry for prolonged periods of time can put them at risk to brain damage. She says that long, hard crying brings on stress and releases the “stress hormone” cortisol. Too much cortisol can cause damage to their brains. Apparently there are no real claims to this as Leach has not revealed any of her sources to back up the evidence to support her argument. I did sleep training with my son and though it was very hard. We never had him crying longer than 45 minutes and it was never so hysterical that I believed he was not under any harm. It worked well for us and he is now a great sleeper for the most part. I could see that leaving your baby to cry hysterically for long periods can cause a great deal of stress on your baby and I would not recommend it. Every child is different and parents need to figure out what they are willing to put up with and be comfortable with whatever approach they decide to take.

Transitioning Your Toddler into a Big Bed

admin — Tue, 06 Apr 2010 20:44:51 +0000

There are many different times that parents decide to transition their toddler into a big bed, potty training, tired of picking them in and out of the crib or maybe they have a second child that will be using the crib. It can be a challenge making the transition a smooth one. Get your child involved by taking them to get the new bed and how they are so big now and get to sleep in a big kid bed. Have them help you make the bed and put their favorite stuffed animals and pillows on it. You may find that the nap/bed time routine becomes disrupted, they can now get out of bed on their own! If you don’t have one already, create a routine to follow before it’s time for bed. Make sure their needs are met before getting them into bed, the glass of water, the night light turned on and their favorite toy in bed with them. if they come out of their room, take their hand and lead them back to their room. It may take some time, but eventually they will understand that they need to stay in their bed when it’s time for to go to sleep.

Do You Make Your Child Hug?

admin — Wed, 31 Mar 2010 22:44:41 +0000

It’s cute when you see children hugging their friends and when they hug family members. It’s is not cute when you force your children to hug someone, especially an adult. I am a pretty affectionate person and I always like to hug and kiss my son. However, I think it’s important to be respectful of their choice if they do not want to hug someone and let them know it’s ok if they don’t want to. You want to be in touch with your child’s temperament and go with what they are comfortable with. It’s a good idea to teach them to be polite to say hello, to shake hands and be respectful to adult. You don’t ever want to make them feel bad or uncomfortable if they do not want to hug your friends or other family members.

Things You Should Not Say to Your Kids

admin — Tue, 23 Mar 2010 22:20:29 +0000

Words can be very powerful things and they can carry a lot more weight and impact than we realize, so as parents we need to choose our words carefully. There are words you should never say to your children. The “F” word is not a good one to be throwing around, it’s not a very nice word, nor would it be good for them to hear and use on the playground or at school. “Shut up” os another one that is not appropriate and it’s insensitive. Using “or else” is just an idle threat. Children should know why and should respect what we say without a dangling threat. Yelling and screaming are not a good way to handle a situation, it also does not give them the sense that we are an adult and in control. Try to remain calm when dealing with situation that may be out of control. Don’t lie to your kids, honesty and trust are important in any relationship. You can’t teach your kids this if they catch you in a lie. These things can make a big difference in how your children to learn to respect others.

Helping Your Child With Homework

admin — Thu, 18 Mar 2010 22:20:25 +0000

If your child is overwhelmed by his or her homework, have no fear, you can learn a few steps to help create the right balance. Talk to the teachers and ask how much parental involvement there should be. Make sure you understand what his or her definition of homework is. Find out if the material is being taught in class and if there is extra support available during class. Find an optimal time for getting homework done, some kids are better in the evening or the morning. Make a schedule so it’s agreed about when homework time is. If it is too challenging and you are finding it hard to help them yourself look into some outside help. Libraries and web sites offer tutoring. Keep a positive attitude, you don’t want to add to the stress you want to help with coping.

Following Through With Your Children

admin — Tue, 10 Mar 2009 19:20:28 +0000

It is important to start setting boundaries with your children when they are young, and stick to them. The main reasons children act out or continue to be on their worst behavior is because of the their parents. Yes, that’s right, many parent will disagree, but it’s true. The more a parent gives in to a child’s tantrums or bad behavior, the more they will take advantage and continue. It is important to be kind and stand firm don’t give into them. You may think that for the short term it’s easier to give in, that’s a problem. Being consistent is key for getting the results that you want for the long term.